哭 - 陈庆祥(阿牛)

Went for service at TCC (my church), the preacher was Pastor Danny. He titled the message, "Set-up, Set-Backs & Set-apart" Well what a timely message.

Why was it a timely message (at least to me)? I have to start this during the Saturday afternoon before service. I woke up around 1030am, after having my breakfast (which is the left over bee-hoon in the fridge made by my mom, during yesterday dinner), I was crouching on the sofa in front of the TV. At 2:30pm I feel kinda bored, I soon decided to go down for a quick jog, despite of the hot sun. As I walk towards the park to do my warm up. Out of a sudden my mind began to wonder back to my special day in 2008. I can't believe it that till now I still cannot accept the fact, my breakup happened on my birthday, I got 2 idiot police as my present. At that point, I really wanted to cry, but no tears came down. Why didn't I fight back? Why didn't I gave that idiot a tight punch? Why? Why? I felt regretful, but Father showed me that situation could have been worst if I had reacted in my way.

After the quick jog, I went back home to prepare for service. It was at the service, Pastor Danny shared about overcoming set-backs in life. What a time for such a message as this. This part of my life is a major set-back. Was Father trying to tell me something? I nearly cried, but the natural man instinct controlled & held back my tears. I went to the altar, wanted to cry but it was so hard. All I can remember was me asking Father; "When can I stop feeling this way?" Father told me to just focus on Him. Well this is the only way. sigh...

I love this song written by a Malaysia Chinese singer, 陈庆祥(阿牛), 哭 (cry)

哭 - 陈庆祥(阿牛)
以前我看到朋友哭
when I saw my friends cry
我很羡慕
i am jealous
可是我怎么逗我自己
yet no matter how I make myself
怎么逗我自己
how i forced myself
我的眼泪都流不出
my tears refuse to flow

总觉得能够哭的朋友都很幸福
to be able to cry is such a blessing
能够把满腔的无奈满腔的痛苦让泪水带走
at the very least all the frustration & pain can be released through tears

最后是泪水啃在心头流不出
at last when tears has formed, yet it doesn't flowed
就像要爱却不懂怎么去爱
as if you desire to love, yet am unsure of how to love

自己哭过后才明白
when i have cried, i finally understood
流过泪的眼睛将生命看得更清楚
the eyes that were being washed by tears, can then see the world much clearer

只有真正懂得付出的人才懂得何为哭为何哭
it's only when you know how to to give, then you will understand what is crying, & why do we cry
再坚强的心偶尔也会脆弱
even the strongest heart, may grow weary at times
心会痛 心也会感动
heart will be pained, heart will be touch

只有曾经真心付出的人才懂得何为哭为何哭
it's only when you know how to to give, then you will understand what is crying, & why do we cry
泪水要记得为真心保留
tears are meant for the true hearts
眼泪别白白地流
never give away your tears so easily